dv: It’s a pleasure talking to You; we’ve been big fans of Yours for some time. Please tell people where You’re currently located and whether You have travel plans for the rest of 2025.
RR: Dickievirgin.com is a kink community staple and I am also a fan of yours! I’m currently in NYC and have plans to travel to Boston, Los Angeles, and San Francisco later this year. I decided to spend My summer in NYC to take a much-needed vacation.
Q: Is NYC where You started Your career, and if not, what brought You to that part of the world?
I was born and raised in NYC! I started My Dominatrix career in San Francisco going as far as to build My own dungeon with ceiling mirrors and all. I came back to NYC because I missed the electricity of the streets and the much larger and more active punk scene. I got into punk in high school and have practically done everything in the scene from singing in bands to having My own record label.
Not one person who I have ever told, from childhood friend to a person I just met, has ever been surprised that I am a Dominatrix. All I wanted as a young girl was to be desired like Jessica Rabbit, to be a vamp that turned heads. I turned out to be more Elvira but with the same results.
Punk fashion was My introduction aesthetically and I picked it up immediately in high school and looked the part – handcuffs on a belt, garters with fishnets, studded leather, and dark eye makeup. I learned more about the underground scenes on the streets of NYC and got invited to work at a dungeon even though I was underage and declined due to My strict curfew. I was extremely good at the psychological aspects of domination, but it was not until college that I started to experiment with asphyxiation, bondage, and pain. Reading Venus in Furs and listening to The Velvet Underground can be a gateway for some.
Even as a teenager, I realized that I was different; when things would just happen like I’d ask a man for a cigarette, and he’d give Me the whole pack. I am used to men being generous with Me as a natural occurrence and not a transactional one- I expect to be treated well. This self-confidence and the desire for power exchange lead Me perfectly into the dungeon. I was a philosophy major who has had several different professions before the world of being Your Mistress, but being a professional Dominatrix Escort is My longest running vocation and My calling.
I would have to say the Dominatrix who shaped Me the most was Cleo Dubois. From what I have seen and know of Her, Cleo treated Her partners and clients with deep respect and invited the spiritual and supernatural into the container She carefully created. There seemed to be a total submission to Her and a surrendering of trust. When She walks into a room or speaks, She commands respect and rules any space She enters. San Francisco was an amazing place to start My journey as kink education was readily available from living legends through places such as the Armory and Cleo’s Erotic Dominance Intensives through SM-Arts.
My first official skills were orgasm edging and tease & denial. I started with tantra and the sensual before moving to strap-on play and prostate pleasure. I don’t remember a specific first session just that I was immediately good at anything I tried, and people would extend sessions or come back the next day. My most memorable sessions often have to do with true masochists – men who stay hard as I inflict pain and watch them go deeper and deeper into subspace. True masochists are rare, and when there is deep trust, then I push the boundaries and physical limits as hard as I can. Eventually, when our time is almost up, they are so flooded with serotonin that an orgasm always kills them. Oh, and fisting is always fun as it’s so intimate when You can feel someone’s heartbeat from the inside.
Q: Well said. What do Your favorite scenes involve?
Worshipping Me and My pleasure goes without saying. I love a true latex fetishist and despise those that just want a wet look as the ritual of latex gets lost – latex is not only about the visual. There must be a desire for the smell of rubber and the sensual sensation of being touched with latex as a sheath. I am a good Dominatrix for exploration, but I love it when My men show up completely and hopelessly weak for their fetishes. Visual sensory deprivation, bondage, sensation play, orgasm edging, teasing, and prostate orgasms are also fun.
Q: Yes, it's so important to enjoy what you do. What sort of facility do You have?
I had My own dungeon in the Bay Area but now I just use hotel rooms. Sometimes it can be hard to find tie points, but I am extremely creative. I have access to dungeons here and shared spaces, but I like to use My own gear and want to have full control over the time and place.
Q: What do You think people assume about Pro Dommes, or more specifically You, that is just not true?
In My professional or personal life, I think the stereotype that we’re cruel and unapproachable which is the complete opposite for Me both in My personal and professional life. I am extremely strict with My protocol for subs and clients, but I have heart. The first thing that happens when we meet is being met with a huge smile. I hunger for a deep relationship with My men and don’t keep it surface level – this is real and not an act. Being a Dominatrix is not a costume for Me or a role.
My site is RamonaRyder.com. I have years of photos and blog posts on it. My blog is a great way to get to know Me and show that My devotion to pleasure and kink has only deepened over the years. I recently went face in and had an arMy of subs and clients who helped remove or crop My face out. I get a lot of support from My men from proofreading to tech help – I could not run RamonaRyder.com without them. The site’s best feature is My mailing list. I send photos out first to My seen men, but all photos and blogs go to the main list. I have city-specific mailing lists for My four main cities: NYC, San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Boston. SIGN UP FOR MY MAILING LIST.
I’m not a virtual person, although I have a free OnlyFans @RamonaRyderNYC to display what You could have in person. Other than that, I am 100% an in-person only provider with a three-hour time minimum. So much happens when one sees Me that anything less than three hours is often not enough to fully experience this Mistress. I’m on X @RamonaRyderNYC, Instagram @MistressRamonaRyder.NYC, and Bluesky @RamonaRyderNYC.
My rates and the three-hour minimum mean that I work less but make more so the live/work life balance is better than it used to be. I love hanging out with other people from this world and going to punk shows and parties. I have a lot of friends who are artists so You can often find Me at art openings. I listen to NPR and read the New York Times all the time. I love documentaries, especially about 1970s NYC. I have a shoe fetish, so I have a massive collection of boots and heels as well as latex and lingerie. My devoted men buying these items that I lust for is a dream come true – I have been obsessed with undergarments and high heels since I was in single digits and a little girl. I wear latex and leather casually and even during the summer. Aesthetically, I am devoted 24/7 to anything such as stockings to corsets any day, any time, any place.
Q: Sounds dreamy! What are some of Your future goals?
My trajectory in this business has always been upward, even as I have gotten older. I think the myth that one ages out is just that, a myth. If one can protect their energy and keep their time sacred, then one can last a lot longer in this industry. I want to write a book because I have so many unbelievable stories and am also living a life beyond My wildest dreams. I have everything I ever wanted and almost exactly as I wanted it. It’s now a matter of aggressively saving and investing for retirement. I want to retire by 2036.